When I started to date with my significance other, I told him ” Be prepared to witness my tears. I like to cry. Shedding tears makes me feel better. It doesn’t mean I am always depressed. I am just emotional and I like to let my emotions flow”. He said ” Its ok. When you cry, I will hold you and I will let you cry as much as you want and I will make you feel better”.
But I have been dating him for four months and he rarely see me cry as there is no reason to cry with him around. He makes me feel happy. He has seen not only happy Hninn, but crazy and wild Hninn, grumpy Hninn and angry Hninn, he still stands firmly on the ground that he loves being with me. For the readers who don’t know us, I am a woman from South East Asian and my boyfriend is a Scottish guy from Glasgow. We met magically in Isle of Man, Europe last year and we fell in love madly. There is a saying that inter racial relationship is a hard work, but not for us. It’s mainly because he bends a lot to meet my requirement and expectation. All my friends know I love romance, I love all the beautiful love stories and I expect my love story as good as stories from the movies or chick lit stories. Well, my love story exceed my expectation. I have never been happier than this.
I grew up in the environment where women always sacrifice for relationship. They cook, clean , bring up children and support husband emotionally. I grew up watching women cook for guests or families and wash dishes after the meals. I didn’t think I would be different. I live in the hospital accommodation and my boyfriend regularly visits me. After awhile, I notice he takes a lot of time in the toilet, I was wondering why. Occasionally, I could hear him breathing fast as if he was doing exercise. And after his every visit, I notice my toilet become whiter. Finally, I found out he cleans up the toilet after he uses it. I was quite shocked. I realized he just wants to help me as he knows I like cleanliness a lot. There are times I invite him for meals whenever I try to cook ( I am a bad cook and just start learning how to cook ). He would come over and always volunteer to clean dishes after meals. One day, he held me and told me ” I am not as thorough as you in cleaning. But I promise I will always clean and do laundry for you”. I said ” aww, that’s sweet darling”. He suddenly said ” but can you share with me in ironing. I hate ironing”.
We were only a month dating and after a few days, he told me ” Hninn, I have never seen anybody who is as good as you , who has so much of positive attitude. You love people and you trust them even though you have been hurt like me. How can you do that?”. He said he is very cynical but now he has more faith in humanity because of me. Every time, when he holds, me, he kiss my forehead and said ” I am not letting you go. Now you are stuck with me”. I don’t know whether it’s because he knows my anxiety or he just wants to reassure me, there is not a single day past without telling me how much he loves me. One thing is both of us love walking in the glen and costal areas, so we walk down the streams and hills during weekends. We love to sit down at the bench, hold the hands and kiss in the middle of the forests. There is a saying that British guys do not like showing affection in public. No, certainly not for his case. I am a very affectionate person even I was born in Asian family. My dad loves to kiss me and holds me in public until I become very adult. I am a big daddy girl until now. So I don’t feel ashamed to hold him or kiss him in public. One time, we were queuing to pay the bills at Tesco and I was behind him, holding his waist from behind. One sweet old lady looked at us , smiled and said ” This is the new way of keeping yourself warm, isn’t it?”. Even though it’s not common to display public affection, a lot of people here are happy for us.
One time, we were walking on the promenade, sea front road . The wind was blowing very harsh and I couldn’t zip up my heavy coat as my hands were frozen and the zip was stuck. He sat down and tried to zip me up ( literally ) and the bus driver stopped for us. It was quite embarrassing as the people on the bus were looking at us. He said ‘ if the people are not happy with us, it’s their problem and not ours” 😛
When I was doing oncall, I was dead tired in the beginning. I was working as a consultant in Myanmar and reducing back to middle grade level doctor was difficult for me as I was not working night duty for four years. The first day when he saw me half asleep on the bed, it made him worried. When he called me , I was not able to respond as I was very sleepy and still in a daze. He drove down to my flat immediately and saw me literally tired and in a bad shape, lying on the bed. He ran towards me and held me ” what happened to you?”. He is not a doctor and he has never seen doctors shattered after 12 hours oncall. It was a new thing for him . At first, I was not aware how worried he was. I realized I needed to reassure him and otherwise he sounded he was going to call an ambulance. So I got up slowly and told him nothing was wrong with me and I was just tired. HE said ” then , can I lie down with you and hold you?”, I said ” yes, if you want to “, but I became a bit uncomfortable as my bed was very small. He then told me ” may be you cannot sleep well because of me around, I am going to the sofa and will wait for you until you wake up” He waited for me six hours to wake up so that he can see me and have a dinner with me.
Sometimes, I am worried about him because it seemed like he focus all his time on me. Sometimes he told me ” I have nothing to give you more because I have given you everything I have especially my time”. Even when he goes for his favorite thing like football, he still comes to me after hours of playing. He is usually sweaty , hungry after football games and sometimes ask me to cook him a quick meal like noodle or just a plain tea which I usually oblige. There is not a day past without talking to each other or visit each other. His friends usually tease him ” where are you going? is it booty call? ” etc. His friends are so macho and wild and he has no intention to introduce me to them. I said One day, I must show up to their football games and must teach them manners. He said they are just winding him up.
We love cuddles. It’s always nice to cuddle someone. When I am with him, I feel content, happy and secured. I never see him looking at other girls when we are in public places. Sometimes, I ask him to look at pretty girls as they are so gorgeous. He said may be , I am not totally straight and he is happy if I want to try the hidden or suppressed part of me. We discussed a lot of things together, including religion, faith, sex, life in general. We are very different in many things yet understand a lot about each other. He is an atheist, but he never feels annoyed by my faith in God. I have many mood swings and it confuses him a lot. In one day, i can be too happy, too sad, too upset or too excited. This is my trait and I cannot change myself. At first, he tries to capture why i am feeling that way , but later realize this is the way I am. He is very simple man, doesn’t need a lot, he says things what he wants and he always says the truth.
There are a lot of things we are not in common. For example, i don’t feel ashamed to break wind or to talk about poo . May be it’s because I am a doctor and I have dealt with shit in many ways . For him, he was quite shocked I discussed about someone bowel habit frankly. He came to me one day, with rumbling tummy. He was not well and wanted to go to toilet, but yet nothing happened and he stayed in toilet quite several minutes. Suddenly, I heard noises and I shouted at him ” Congratulations” which made him crimson . He said ” Hnin, you are so bad. why are you shouting?” with a giggle. He is just so cute. He then started to call me us ” unfiltered Hnin” as I can say things suddenly without any filter.
One day, I was tired after three days 12 hour oncall, he called me and said ” can you pack the overnight bag. I am coming to your place” , then he drove me to the hotel with most beautiful stunning sea view. Although he doesn’t earn as much as me, he is never reluctant to spend for my happiness. HE then said ” let’s go to the restaurant which you might like ” and we both tried the best sushi in Isle of Man. He doesn’t know how to use chopsticks and I taught him, but I failed, but who cares, he pierced the sushi with chopstick instead of clumping them. Then we have amazing night, just talking to each other and holding. When I woke up, I saw his smiling face, holding the cutest Winnie the pooh toy. I didn’t even know where he got the toy. He then impersonated Pooh voice and said ” hey, good morning Hnin”. By the way, he is very good at impersonating . He can do Tiger voice and he is just so funny.
When I gets so tired, he gives me shoulder massage and rub my back with baby oil. Then I sleep better. In return, I always tries to massage his feet. He has never had massage and he doesn’t even know how to do it until he met me. But he likes me to lay my head on the sofa and put my feet on his lap so that he can rub until my muscles become relaxed. At first, I was not comfortable him holding my feet as in my culture, we need to respect guys and should not touch them with feet. When I explained the concept of females inferior to male , he got so annoyed.
He is a very shy guy and usually doesn’t talk much, but with me, he is like a chatter box. he talks a lot of stuff especially football and astronomy which I rarely interested. But when he talks these things, his deep blue eyes lit up and he becomes a child again. And I really love my guy turning into an excited teenager, with wide blue eyes, fixated on the video about astronomy. He has a child like wonder and he takes things around him very graciously.
One day, He was driving and I was sitting in his car. I told him I feel tiredness quite easily nowadays when I do medical oncall . He asked me ” why don’t you do training here to become a consultant then?”. I said ” I can’t do training in Isle of Man and I need to go overseas”. He was silent for a few minutes and he suddenly said ” if you want to move to another place in uk, I am going to follow you and will support you”. I was choked with emotion and I blinked my eyelashes so that my tears would not fall. I know how much he loves his parents , his niece, nephew and his sister. They are everything to him and he has been living in Isle of Man for 15 years. He has a decent job which pays him well. But suddenly he decided he will change his career to elsewhere for me. So I cried because I was touched.
He is not handsome, yet he is the best good looking man for me.
I find his heart full of love everyday, he makes sure I know that I am loved everyday.
What a girl can ask more?
I am very lucky that I have met him. Love has changed both of us.
We are now two less lonely people in the world. We are happier, more content and we believe we will overcome all our problems together.
Thank you for reading.